Venting.

Yesterday, James and I went rock climbing.  It was cold, so we got a climb in but then we just skipped rocks and hung out for the next couple hours.

I went to work, and got off early, so we got back together and got some yummy sushi and then went to my preschool room and painted pictures of where we thought the other person would want to live.  We then spent the next couple hours painting, laughing, talking, and just having a great time.
                           

(The one on the left was what James made for me, and the one on the right was what I made for James)

(The one we both made)

Our paintings that we made for each other were different, but they had the same ideas.  Somewhere, on a mountain, with water, and that silly blue truck of his.  I have totally fallen for him, and have never felt better about anything in my whole life.  I get such a positive feeling and i'm so happy when i'm with him.  But he feels the opposite.  And so he's leaving to work and go to Jerusalem for the next 8 months.  And I guess the point of this post is not to gush, or complain, but rather to speculate on some things.  I know that God has a plan, but it seems like every time I start to be happy, or have something good going, he has to turn it all upside down.  Why is this?  I believe that his plan is better than mine, but I also get frustrated at the constant up and down of everything.  He has this bad feeling, and I believe that.  But I wish I knew why that was, or what I could fix so that the feeling could go away for him.  Either that, or I just wish I understood what the purpose of all this was.  Why go through the trouble, and exert effort and feelings on someone or something that God will end up saying isn't right anyways?

I think I feel this way about a lot of things.  Things start to look up, and then something else gets thrown in the way.  At work, at school, anything.  Just when you think things are perfect, you find out they are not.  Do we ever get a break?  I guess I just need to work on my faith in him, because I do feel a little bitter about this whole process.  I know I shouldn't, but I do.

Anyways, sorry about the venting post, but just something to think about.  Until next time, here's a good song for you all.